Clean Jokes

SMS Jokes -

Enjoy our collection of sms jokes, after all that’s what they are here for!

Top Ten One Liners

Posted in One Liners, Short Jokes

1. Escalators don’t break down… they just turn into stairs
2. “I’m sorry” and “I apologize” mean the same thing… except when you’re at a funeral.
3. I intend to live forever… or die trying.
4. We never knew he was a drunk… until he showed up to work sober.
5. A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
6. A blind man walks into a bar….And a table, and a chair.
7. At what age is it appropriate to tell my dog that he’s adopted?
8. Want to hear a pizza joke…. nah, it’s too cheesy. What about a construction joke? Oh never mind, I’m still working on that one. Did you hear the one about the rope? Skip it. Have you heard the one about the guy in the wheelchair? Never mind, it’s too lame.
9. I used to be in a band, we were called ‘lost dog’. You probably saw our posters.
10. I childproofed the house… but they still get in!

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Sleep Joke

Posted in One Liners, Text Jokes

Sleep is my drug….my bed is my dealer….and my alarm clock is the police.

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Brain Joke

Posted in One Liners, Short Jokes

I used to think the brain was the most important organ. Then I thought, look what’s telling me that.

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Midget Joke

Posted in Funny Puns, Short Jokes

Q. What did the police officer say to the midget complaining that someone picked his pocket?
A. I can’t believe someone would stoop so low.

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Don’t Exaggerate!

Posted in One Liners, Short Jokes, Text Jokes

If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times don’t exaggerate!

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Cow Joke

Posted in Blonde Jokes, Short Jokes

Q. How did the blonde die while drinking milk.

A.The cow sat down.

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Robin Joke

Posted in Cheesy Jokes, Short Jokes

Q. What did the cat say after eating two robins lying in the sun?
A. I just love baskin’ robins.

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Swimming Pool Joke

Posted in One Liners, Text Jokes

Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards
the local swimming pool. I gave him a glass of water.

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Joy Of Marriage Joke

Posted in Marriage Jokes, One Liners, Wedding Jokes

Marriage is like a bar of soap. It smells delicious until you take a bite out of it!

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Hypothetical Joke

Posted in One Liners, Text Jokes, Witty One Liners

What if there were no hypothetical situations?

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