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Funny Tie Cartoon

Posted in Funny Cartoons

Funny Blue Eye Joke
Lady asks a sales person for some help finding her husband a tie and gets a surprising response.

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The Hoki Poki Joke

Posted in Funeral Jokes

So, I’m sure you all heard of John Hoki, the inventor of the Hoki Poki. While John’s life is well known, what’s not so well know, is a story that happened at his funeral in the late 1940′s.

Being that John was quite a popular fella, mostly due to the Hoki Poki, which spread like wildfire through his small Middle Eastern town, thousands showed up for his funeral, all coming to bid him farewell.

Well, it happened right before the ceremony was about to begin, when the undertaker gently lifted John up to place him in the coffin. The problem that arose was that as soon as they put his right foot in…….(I’m sure you can figure out the rest.)

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Sneaky Lawyer Cartoon

Posted in Funny Cartoons

Lawyer Cartoon
A man walks into a lawyer’s office and asks how much he charges, the answer was quite a surprise!

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My Favorite Pranks

Posted in Funniest Pranks

Ever since I was a child I had a fascination with pranks! Friends asked me for my favorite pranks, so I decided to write them down for you all in descending order. I made the pictures all link to their page in Amazon in case you decide it’s worth buying!

1. STAND BACK, HOLD YOUR NOSE AND RUN! This spray is DEADLY! There is nothing, and I repeat nothing that can possibly smell worse than this! This spray is perfect for spraying in a  room of people you don’t like!

2.I’m making this my #2 not because it’s so well made, but rather because this is guaranteed to get the loudest scream out of all of the pranks! The only downside is that you aren’t privy to the fun because the pranky will presumably lock the bathroom door before entering. But believe me… you will hear the scream loud and clear from anywhere in the house!

3.This CREEPY Peeping Tom will soooo scare the living daylights out of somebody! This one is HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!

4. I couldn’t possibly make a list of pranks without a farting device could I? This remote control Fart Machine  definitely beats a woopee cushion.  It makes more farting sounds than you can imagine and it’s sooo realistic sounding!

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Fatty Joke

Posted in Funny Stories, Husband Wife Jokes, Life Jokes, Relationship Jokes, Women Jokes

There were no two ways about it.  Rosie was fat.  Very fat.  “Martha”, said Rosie to her best friend, “it was terrible what happened yesterday after the birthday party. You know how half of the birthday cake was left over? Well, I knew Bob would be fuming at me for eating it,with my diet and all, but I couldn’t help myself, it started with just a small nibble and before I knew it the whole cake was gone!.”

“Oh my!” clucked Martha, “was Bob really upset?”

“He never found it”, responded Rosie with a full double chin smile, “I just baked another cake and ate half of it!”

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New Car Cartoon

Posted in Funny Cartoons

vroom vroom1
Boss wants to reward his employee, but the employee just doesn’t get it! :)

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Tip Of The Iceberg Joke

Posted in Funny Puns

As I was taking a walk with my daughter one day, I noticed something green in her hair.   To my disbelief I pulled out a piece of lettuce from her hair.  “Whoa!” she exclaimed, “is there anything else in there?”  she asked.  “Oh no!” I joked.  “That was just the tip of the Iceberg!”

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When I was Born Cartoon

Posted in Funny Cartoons

When I was born cartoon

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Toilet Brush Joke

Posted in Clever Jokes, Funny Stories, Life Jokes, Women Jokes

Lauren was frustrated. She had complained dozens of times to her daughter about her newest gag of kissing the bathroom mirror immediately after applying lipstick, but it was all to no avail. Finally, one day after spending a half hour scrubbing the mirror, only to find another kiss mark an hour later, Lauren had enough. “Lizzy!” she hollered, “What?” came her daughter’s reply through her bedroom door. I can’t find the toilet brush that I’ve been using to clean the bathroom mirror. Do you have any idea where it is?”

After hearing the gagging from behind the bedroom door, Lauren knew her days of cleaning kiss marks off of mirrors were over.

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Gambling Joke

Posted in Corny Jokes

Q: Why couldn’t the sesame seed leave the gambling casino?
A: Because he was on a roll.

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