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The following is a list of our best jokes. Included are various lists of top rated jokes, including also our personal top ten jokes, please enjoy!

Clean Restaurant Joke

So these two roaches, Tom and Oscar, are hanging out next to a dumpster enjoying a snack. “Hey Tom” said Oscar  to his friend, “You know that restaurant down the block? I went there yesterday to pick up some scraps, and I couldn’t believe how clean it was, I could practically see my reflection through the shiny waxed floor.” “Oscar” hollered Tom spitting the food out of his mouth, “please not while I am eating!!”

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Rating: 2.3/5 (1835 votes cast)
Posted in Food Jokes, Good Jokes

Best Rated Joke

We strongly encourage our users, to rate the jokes that they have an opinion on, so that readers can find the funniest jokes quicker. The following is our top rated joke out of our entire database of jokes, so please enjoy!

TitleVotesRatingReview
Phone Meme754.4-1.0

Posted in Joke Of The Day

Top 10 Jokes

The following jokes are rated the highest out of all the jokes found at Great Clean Jokes, please click on the joke in order to see them, enjoy!

TitleVotesRatingReview
April Fools Day Prank1694.4-1.0
Phone Meme754.4-1.0
Cat Meme654.4-1.0
Conversation Differences Between Men And Women1374.3-1.0
Rest Stop Joke1214.3-1.0
The Solution To Oversleeping914.3-1.0
Amish Joke904.3-1.0
Funny Marshmallow Meme494.3-1.0
Funny Tie Cartoon374.3-1.0
Eyebrows Meme94.3-1.0
Posted in Funniest Jokes
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Lawyers Daughter Joke

Q. What did the lawyer name his daughter?
A. Sue.

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Rating: 3.3/5 (848 votes cast)
Posted in Corny Jokes, Good Jokes, Lawyer Jokes

Hilarious Video – About Phobias

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Rating: 4.2/5 (397 votes cast)
Posted in Funny Videos, Good Jokes, Phobia Jokes

Surgery Joke

Before going in for surgery I thought it would be funny if I posted a note on myself telling the surgeon to be careful. After the surgery I found another note on myself .”Anyone know where my cell phone is????????”

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Rating: 3.0/5 (566 votes cast)
Posted in Good Jokes, Surgery Jokes

Heaven Joke

A man died and went to The Judgment, they told him , “Before you meet with God,  I should tell you — we’ve looked over your life, and to be honest you really didn’t do anything particularly good or bad. We’re not really sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you did that can help us make a decision?”

The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, “Yeah, once I was driving along and came upon a person who was being harassed by a group of thugs. So I pulled over, got out a bat, and went up to the leader of the thugs. He was a big, muscular guy with a ring pierced through his lip. Well, I tore the  ring out of his lip, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering this guy or they would have to deal with me!”

“Wow that’s impressive, “When did this happen?”

“About three minutes ago,” came the reply.

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Rating: 4.2/5 (1250 votes cast)
Posted in Good Jokes, Heaven Jokes, Long Jokes

Memory Problems Joke

A few old couples used to get together to talk about life and to have a good time. One day one of the men, Harry, started talking about this fantastic restaurant he went to the other night with his wife. “Really?”, one of the men said, what’s it called? After thinking for a few seconds the Harry said, “what are those good smelling flowers called again?” “Do you mean a rose? the first man questioned. “Yes that’s it,” he exclaimed. Looking over at his wife he said, “Rose what’s that restaurant we went to the other night?”

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Rating: 4.0/5 (493 votes cast)
Posted in Good Jokes, Long Jokes, Old People Jokes

Can You Hear Me??????

An old man went to the Doctor complaining that his wife could barely hear. The Doctor suggested a test to find out the extent of the problem. “Stand far behind her and ask her a question, and then slowly move up and see how far away you are when she first responds.” The old man excited to finally be working on a solution for the problem, runs home and sees his wife preparing supper. ” Honey” the man asks standing around 20 feet away “whats for supper?” After receiving no response he tried it again 15 feet away, and again no response. Then again at 10 feet away and again no response. Finally he was 5 feet away “honey whats for supper?
She replies “For the fourth time it’s lasagna!”

 

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Rating: 4.2/5 (960 votes cast)
Posted in Funny Speech Openers, Good Jokes, Husband Jokes, Long Jokes, Marriage Jokes, Old People Jokes

The Forgetful Actor

An actor had been out of work for 15 years because he always forgot his lines. Then one day he got a phone call from a director who wanted him for a big part in a play. All he had to say was “Hark! I hear the cannon roar! After much worry the actor decided to take  the role. Opening night arrived, and while he waited in the wings, the actor muttered to himself “Hark! I hear the cannon roar! Hark! I hear the cannon roar! The time for the entrance finally came and as the actor made his appearance, he heard a loud brooooom! He turned around and said, “what the hell was that?” -Robert De Nero

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Rating: 3.5/5 (449 votes cast)
Posted in Funny Speech Openers, Good Jokes, Long Jokes
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