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Enjoy our collection of funny sayings, after all that’s what they are here for!

Joke About Being Unique

Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else.

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Rating: 3.8/5 (330 votes cast)

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Posted in Funny Sayings, Text Jokes, Witty One Liners

Music Joke

If the music’s too loud you’re too old.

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Rating: 3.1/5 (253 votes cast)

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Posted in Funny Sayings, Text Jokes, Witty One Liners

Luck Joke

I get enough exercise just pushing my luck!

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Rating: 3.2/5 (137 votes cast)

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Posted in Funny Sayings, Witty One Liners
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Thesaurus Joke

What’s another word for Thesaurus?

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Rating: 3.1/5 (116 votes cast)

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Posted in Funny Sayings, Witty One Liners

Nursing Home Quote

“Be nice to your children – they will be choosing your nursing home”

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Rating: 3.8/5 (56 votes cast)

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Posted in Funny Sayings

Pessimist Thought

The pessimist may be right in the long run, but the
optimist has a better time during the trip.

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Rating: 3.7/5 (51 votes cast)

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Posted in Funny Sayings, Funny Thoughts

Patience Quote

Dear G-D please help me have patience…………………..and make it quick!

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Rating: 3.2/5 (55 votes cast)

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Posted in Cute Quotes, Funny Sayings

The Bachelors Excuse

A recent study shows that men who are married live longer than single men, but they’re a lot more willing to die.

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Rating: 4.1/5 (82 votes cast)

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Posted in Funny Sayings, Wife Jokes

Time!

Time is the best teacher, the only problem is it kills all of its students.

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Rating: 4.0/5 (60 votes cast)

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Posted in Cute Quotes, Funny Quotes, Funny Sayings

The Final Solution

When everything else fails – try the directions.

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Rating: 3.6/5 (50 votes cast)

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Posted in Funny Sayings
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